Day 5 of the "cleanse"

I put the word cleanse in quotes because I haven't been sure from the beginning of this if that's really the right word for what I'm doing.  In a sense it is a cleanse - I am not eating any of the foods that give me trouble (grains, dairy, sugar), and for the first 3 days I consumed only vegetables, broth and fruit.   Also for those first 5 days I didn't drink any coffee, caffeinated or not.  This morning, I am thoroughly enjoying a cup of home made organic half-decaf coffee - man I missed this!  But by some people's standards this isn't really a cleanse, I just was at a loss for a better word.

Yesterday was a really busy, full day of volunteering from 10-3 and then running a bunch of errands. Breakfast was a poached egg and some applesauce and then I snacked on some cashews and an apple at mid-day.  By 4pm I had stopped at Mod Market for a spinach salad w chicken, which I only ate a few bites of as I was on the run.  Got home and finished my salad with more chicken at home, some beets & spicy pumpkin seeds.  Last night I had a few bites of an apple with almond butter, and that was it for the day.  I went to bed feeling satiated, although my tummy was somewhat unhappy with all that raw spinach - sometimes that's a little problematic for me.   But my take away from yesterday was that I did a great job of managing my blood sugar (by drinking plenty of clean water with tangerine essential oil)  and making good food choices in a very busy day.

The other food that I haven't indulged in for the last 6 days is my beloved bacon.  :-)  God, I love bacon, and was eating it pretty often.  I miss it for sure, but getting that sodium out of my system is a good thing, and it was becoming yet another obsession.

And since I don't feel very good when I eat eggs too often, I skipped them this morning.  I sauteed onion, mushrooms, spinach, added some cooked sweet potato and left over chicken - that along with some strawberries & cherries made a delicious breakfast that will give me the energy to power through this day of house cleaning & dryer repair.  :-)   Later this afternoon I will probably have some riced cauliflower, sauteed with onion and chopped broccoli and add a little ground beef.   Either that or more of the chicken soup I threw together the other night.   I always feel better when I eat only two main meals a day, with a little snack or two in between.  It's easier to get to sleep at night when I haven't eaten for the past 4-5 hours - my cancer modified GI system seems to kick into full gear late at night as it is. :-(

Stepping on the scale this morning was further reinforcement that I'm on the right track, as I was down still another pound (4-5 lbs total lost in the last 6 days).  I'd like to get back down to where I was when I felt at my best, which is another 5-6 pounds.  As long as I keep listening to my body and giving it what IT wants (not what my emotions want) I know that will happen.  Yes it takes discipline to turn down sugar and other yumminess this time of year, but since getting sober I really like not facing the new year with a feeling of having over indulged.  I have big, big plans for 2015 and my intuition is guiding me to prepare for it now, and get ready for a great year.  And I have more than earned it!

Happy Sunday, blessings to all! Thanks for listening. :-)

Cleanse Update - Days 3 & 4

Sorry there was no post yesterday, I was running all day with no chance to update.  Today has been much the same, so this is coming pretty late.

My cleansing got a little goofy yesterday, due to my crazy schedule and making friend time one of my priorities.  That translated into being at a restaurant for lunch at 2pm, hungry, knowing I wouldn't be home until after 5.  So I made the best choice I could; a plain burger patty wrapped in lettuce leaves (I ate half) and a side salad with my own dressing (olive oil & lemon that I brought from home - yay for a little planning ahead).  Not bad, just a day ahead of when I planned to add some solid food as I decided smoothies probably wouldn't feel much better in my body than the juicing had.

So last night I had a nice salad with spinach, beets, carrots - it was very comforting and cleansing. Afterwards I had some thawed out frozen tart cherries - yummy desert, lots of antioxidants, low glycemic so not a big hit to my blood sugar.  Went to bed feeling really good - I actually think the protein from the burger gave me energy & sustenance that was very supportive.

This morning I had an egg scrambled with some veggies, and a 1/2 apple.  Delicious and kept me satisfied until about 2pm, when I once again found myself away from home and in need of food.  I had a couple of almonds and some in-season fruit, which gave me fat & carbs to tide me over.  When I got home I added some sauteed chicken & fresh veggies to my bone broth,  enjoying a nice warm bowl of soup for an early dinner.  Another 1/2 apple and a cup of tea and day 4 is a wrap!

I'm feeling really good, no sugar cravings at all today.  The eczema on my eyes has calmed down considerably, my hot flashes today were much better, and the last two nights I have slept like a baby. One of my rings that was tight a week ago now fits looser, and when I stepped on the scale this morning I was down 3 lbs, which I know is inflammation.  All in all I am really happy with how I am feeling and how positively my body is responding when I pay attention to it.

Bella and I got out for a nice walk today, and it was really gorgeous.  I so appreciate my body for all it does for me, and I am truly thankful.  What a week it's been!

Cleanse - Modified day 2

~ From Wednesday, December 10th ~

My first experience with juicing was about 3 years ago, not long after my chemotherapy for colon cancer had ended.  My trainer suggested it as a way to detox my body from all the drugs, and I was very excited to feel better - I felt pretty lousy at that point.  I went gung ho, juicing 2x a day, mixing up veggies and fruits to find a combo that appealed to me.  It didn't take long at all for my body to clearly signal that it didn't like what I was giving it.  I tried sticking it out for a while, refusing to believe that something I kept hearing was a miracle for so many people wasn't working for me. Finally, I gave it up, my body calmed down and I realized I needed to find other ways to heal.

By the time I went to bed last night, I was feeling much the same as I had a few years past.  I had hoped that this would be different as my body is so much healthier, but evidently not.  I don't know what my body doesn't like about juicing and in the end, it doesn't matter. What matters is that I listen to my intuition and respond accordingly with love and respect for my body.  So I have modified my cleanse a bit today.

This morning I steamed some veggies and added that to my broth - carrots, zucchini and baby bok choy.  It was delicious and I instantly felt better.  So for lunch I had a salad of baby spinach, cucumber, carrots, beets and some chopped pistachio's, dressing it with fresh lemon juice & olive oil, along with a cup of plain broth.  Again, my body responded with energy, calmness and a feeling of lightness.  Maybe my body just craves foods in their wholeness, which makes sense.  I even gave Bella some of the broth with cooked veggies and she loved it.  :-)

I am feeling much better today/tonight than last night.  I've been drinking lots of water (and making lots of trips to the bathroom), and I had a small spoonful of almond butter this afternoon for some extra fat & protein and that helped with feeling satiated. Tomorrow is day 3, which will probably look much like today with regards to food.

I don't feel hungry or deprived of anything, but I am fantasizing about cookies lol.  Cutting out coffee has made a huge difference in how my tummy and my nerves feel, but I miss the ritual of it. Food is so emotional for most of us, so was drinking for me.  But since cancer I thought food had become less emotional and I have been finding that isn't really true.  Food still feels like joy, and somewhat like a lover.  Interesting .....

Stay tuned. :-)

Cleanse Day 1

As I sit here in the peace and quiet of my home, watching the fire in my fireplace start to burn,  I feel immensely grateful for the life that I am privileged to wake up to each morning.   When not eating solid food for a few days, things like gratitude are great to feed my soul on.

The day has not been difficult at all, even though there have been some food cravings.  So far today I have had two mugs of my home made broth (cooked for 24 hours total - really delicious and flavorful), two cups of decaf tea and one large juice drink.  Here's what I juiced today:
1 large beet
2 small granny smith apples
3-5 carrots
2-3 celery stalks
1 small lemon (with the peel roughly sliced off or it tastes bitter)
1/2 large cucumber
1 small slice of fresh ginger

That's actually my favorite combination so I will most likely repeat that for the next couple of days.  I will have one more juice tonight, and that may be it.  I've done a good job with my water intake, so I am feeling very hydrated.  I have had a slight headache for most of the day but I expected that on day one.  I am denying my body the caffeine and the empty calories it's gotten used to, and a headache is a pretty normal response.  I am a bit tired and looking forward to a good nights sleep, which is not what I had last night for some reason.

So why a cleanse?  I know that word has become sort of a catch-all these days, and it seems to have different definitions and purposes, depending on who you ask.  For me, these next few days will be a chance for my digestive system to rest and heal as I won't be giving it much to deal with.  I am still nourishing my body with protein, fats and carbohydrates so it can run properly.  But by not consuming any sugars, grains, dairy, etc., I am letting the inflammation in my body calm down, which will further soothe my digestive tract, ease some of the symptoms I mentioned yesterday and help me drop some weight.   The sugar, along with caffeine, is also a stimulant which over time takes a toll on my central nervous system, and impacts my life on many levels, including my sleep.  Flushing all these toxins out of my system with the help of lots of clean, filtered water, will help me feel and sleep better, which will give me more energy and enable me to think more clearly, have better focus and mental stamina.  Plus I anticipate it will also help my hormones settle down, and I will have fewer hot flashes.  And when it's all said and done, I expect my clothes will fit better and I will feel better in them - and who doesn't want to feel good in their clothes (or out of them for that matter?).  All of this is, to me, a huge payoff for a few days of being a little hungry.

How do I know all of this?  Well, some of it is what I have read and learned from others, and some of it I just know.  I think we all know things - about ourselves and what is right for us, about the world around us and the people in it- without knowing how.   We all have inherent wisdom and we all have our own intuition.  I think the keys are listening, trusting and then leaning into that wisdom.   Not always easy, but for me, always worth it.  Ask yourself what you know, have always known,  yet can't explain why - what is that knowing telling you and are you listening?  If not, why?

I am exhausted so even though it's only 5:30 in the evening, I am going to wash my face, crawl into bed and read a bit.  Good rest is crucial to my well being anytime, but especially through this process.
Night night peeps, sweet dreams.  Join me again tomorrow for another update, I will hopefully have more energy.  :-)

Time for a cleanse

When your intuition speaks to you, how well do you listen?  Well, my intuitive voice has been telling me a good cleanse would be helpful to my well being at the moment, so I am starting on that tomorrow.  Thought I'd share what my plan is and will blog each day on how I am doing.  

First, on the topic of cleanses let me just say that I am NOT a fan of being hungry.  However,  I have become familiar with my body and it's responses, and here is what I am noticing:

• More pain in my digestive system lately - this is mainly from all my cancer surgeries and obstructions, but it worsens when my diet isn't as clean
• Increased & intense hot flashes and constant under arm odor - this too, I have noticed over time, is worse when I get too relaxed with what I eat
• Inflammation in my body - my pants are a bit tighter yes but so are my rings and my boots, and this also explains some of the pain I mentioned above
• An increase in eczema outbreaks, including one around my eyes that my prescription cream is not resolving
• Increasingly intense cravings for starchy, high glycemic carbohydrates like baked goods, potato chips, bread, sugary foods, etc. 
• More unexplained and disturbing dreams and nightmare activity

What I have been eating that is causing this unrest in my body is sugar, wheat and other grains, dairy, coconut, cinnamon and nightshades - these are all foods I am sensitive to.  If you're not familiar with nightshades, here's a great article: http://www.thepaleomom.com/2013/08/what-are-nightshades.html

Everyone has their own sensitivities, be it with foods, smells, sounds, people, emotions, etc. - the key is to tune into your own body's signals and then do something about them. I've given you a list of some of my warning signs, do any of those ring a bell with you?  What are some of your signals?  If you already know, that's great.  If you do not, becoming aware can be a huge step toward having the body and life you really want.  

So here is my cleanse plan (more later on why a cleanse and why now):

1. For the first 3 days, I will drink home-made bone broth and fresh juices using organic, whole fruits and veggies.  Here's more info on bone broth if you are interested:  http://nourishedkitchen.com/bone-broth/
2. On days 4-5, I will add a smoothie each day made with frozen organic greens & fruit with walnuts as the protein source
3. On days 6-7 I will add steamed & pureed veggies to my broth
4. On days 8-10 I will slowly add back in foods like sweet potatoes, nut butters and small amounts of chicken, turkey and fish. 
5. Throughout each of these 10 days I will make sure I am drinking half my body weight in pure, filtered water to which I will add either lemon (alkalizing), tangerine (curbs sweet cravings) or peppermint (helps smooth digestion) essential oils to assist my body in detoxifying
6. I will add 1-2 teaspoons of organic, unrefined coconut oil to my juices and my smoothies.  This helps my body assimilate the nutrients from my food and also provides the necessary fats for good organ function and to support my nails, hair and skin. 
7. Lastly, I will be focusing on getting plenty of sleep (aiming for 8-9 hours each night), exercise, (outside if possible) and quiet time for reflection and journaling so that my mind can process all the emotions that will be coming up during my cleanse.  

So now I have declared my intention and you are free to hold me accountable (just beware, accountability is a two-way street with me).  :-)  As I said, I will give more details on what I am doing and how things are going in the upcoming days - I hope you will join me on this little adventure into a healthier holiday and a strong start to my new year.  Cheers! 

Random observations from Portland

So I'm in Portland for the weekend - alone.  Why Portland and why now you ask? Well, here's the deal - I was getting a healing touch treatment a while back and we were working on letting go of the past.  And while I'm laying there, trying to move into the present, I start planning this trip in my head.  A trip where I ... go revisit my past.  lol  Seriously.  I know, right?  wth??  So, I realized what I was doing, and decided I would in fact take a trip, but I would take myself someplace I have never been, create a new experience, a new memory.  And Portland just popped into my head, unbidden.  I found a trip on Expedia for $500, air and hotel for 3 nights, so I booked it.  And here I am, adventurous free spirit, exploring a city I have never been to, in the winter, on my own.  Yeah, I'm just kooky like that.

So Portland is a pretty cool city from what I can see so far.  I know I am not seeing it in it's best light because of the weather (cold, dreary and rainy), but here's what I like so far:  The people seem not only nice and friendly, but they generally like living here.  It is not only very diverse in it's population, but seemingly very accepting of that diversity.  And they are very "green" here, very eco-conscious.  The main thing so far that would keep me from living happily here is this dreary weather - I don't think they see much sunshine this time of year.  That would be tough, weather has a strong affect on my emotions.

I am going to change lanes now - ready?  Okay, here we go.  When I was a kid, I just loved my mothers hands.  They were strong, loving, fine boned hands - hands that were so capable of everything and anything.  Caring for her family, kneading and baking home-made bread that was always hot and ready for us when we got home from school, sewing all of my clothes before I started growing too fast, canning our fresh-grown summer fruits and vegetables,  playing & trying to teach me the piano, nursing me back to health when I didn't feel good, gently waking me up every morning for school, and in the last moments of her life, caressing my face as she said "I don't want to leave you". They were amazing hands, belonging to an amazing woman.  And as I was gazing at my hands the other night, I thought "wow, I finally have my mothers hands - isn't that cool".  Yeah, that's pretty damn cool.

Okay, I am downtown Portland and sitting in a Starbucks.  I better get out and walk around a bit. Later peeps.  Hugs.