My birthday

So I turned 52 years old today, and it occurred to me that I am now the age my mother was when her husband, my father, died of metastatic lung cancer.   Twenty years later, my mother died of ovarian cancer at the age of 72.   And today I'm prepping my body for a colonoscopy, as part of being followed after colon cancer 3+ years ago when I was only 48.

Needless to say, I really don't want my eventual exit from this life to look like my parents' - I have every intention of someday dying in my sleep, a very old, very happy lady.  And every thing about my life since my cancer diagnosis has been in pursuit of that kind of end .... a long, long time from now.

A big part of that was to stop drinking.  Part of it has been learning how to eat well for my body.  And a big part of it has been changing my thoughts, my beliefs, my values - Maybe "changing" them isn't the right word, maybe it's more about pulling them all out, re-examining them and just deciding if they're still working for me, or against me.  I think we can do that at any time in our life, but being humans, we tend to not do it until we're pushed up against a wall.  I hope and pray every day that my efforts are not too little too late.  I don't want to live forever, I just want to live until I am done, and I'm nowhere near done.

Happy Birthday to me!  It's been a quiet one for sure, but I am extremely grateful for every minute of it.

Hugs to all!